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Thursday, June 25, 2015

Where are your teeth?

You know it's a busy day, or your running late or are completely frazzled. How? Halfway to work realize you forgot something.........................YOUR TEETH! IT was a grand day.

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Internet Dating for Russian Brides.



June 20

My dearest, Kseniya. I’m so, so sorry I’ve been remiss in addressing your needs. It has been a busy yet productive week. Billy if block three became a dad which had us all giving him high fives. Unfortunately for him, he had a few outstanding poker debts and was forced to relinquish his fatherhood and marital status to Leroy in block C. Not sure his wife is pleased with the arrangement, but it beats being six feet under.

My team, The Coffin Crypters made the finals for the International Convicts Tournament. No this isn’t like the Freaker’s Ball by Doctor Hook and the Medicine Band. This is the real “World Serious” for hard felons only. We are a bit of a unique bunch to say the least.

 Well, we made it to the finals with a squad of twelve men. The other thirteen are in the infirmary recovering from the mis-timed brawl with the Cleveland Crunchers. I think it had something to do with Boris Kransky knifing their catcher, Mother Puss Bucket when Mother made a few unwise comments about him having an affair with his mother’s second cousin on his mom’s side who was twice removed from his Father’s side which resulted in a most disingenuous genealogical tree. See, Boris and Mother are actually third cousins, yet by their marriages, both male and female found them as twin brothers of the same daughter from different fathers. Well, when the dust cleared from the scruff and the bodies were counted, appears the incest poll depository is going to have a run on organs this week.

Okay, back to the big game. Since I’d be pitching the final game, I needed true inspiration. Where do you think I found it??? That’s right, sweetie. Your lovely, adoring pictures. I printed out a few. Put one in my cap and one in my cup.  That way, if the pressure became too much, I could rub you for luck.

Back to the game. It was a barn burner going into the ninth. We had the bastards down by two. Lucky Lucy, yeah, he’s from block 96. They do everything backwards over there. Last time he/she came to the plate I threw one high and tight cleaning up the five o’clock shadow. It responded by throwing the bat at me of which I threw it straight back, cracking its skull. Was he/she deterred? Not at all. Couple of bandage and fifty stitches and the SOB stayed in the line-up. Well, being the calm headed individual I am, I couldn’t be upstaged. So I drilled it right between the eyes. A normal person would have succumbed to a ninety mph fastball in the noggin, but not him/her. It turned into a raging bull! I’m here to tell you, what happened next isn’t for the faint of heart. I will tell you that the game has been indefinitely suspended until each team can field nine players. This could be a few months. I want you to know, if it weren’t for your strategically placed picture, I would have lost my lucky charms.

I think that’s enough for today. I do hope you’ll write back soon. Your words, I’m sure, will assist me as my ribs, leg, arm and spleen recover.

Your undying admirer,


Sam the Sham 

Come on guys, do you really think this is who you're talking to? Take a good look at the photos and tell me it's the same girl. But hey, if you're willing to take a chance, be my guess. Make sure your deep pockets. You're going to need it when she finds a divorce attorney. 

Monday, June 15, 2015

News on the Dating front. From Orel Russia with Love

Appears our love is budding. Don't believe? Wait till you she what she wrote. But, before I go on, remember this, I'm fifty-five, with three children and nine grandchildren. Does anyone out there really believe I want to start over? Let's think about that for a minute. ah, no. How about, HELL NO! There, I feel better. On with the show! 

Hello  Jeff !!!!! I am glad that you have answered me, I'll be glad to meet  you.  My  name  is Kseniya, I am 27 years old, my birthday is on
July  14  at the horoscope I crayfish. My height - 167 centimeters. My weight  - 50 kg. As you can see in my photos, I have green eyes and my
hair color is blonde.  I'm from Russia, live in Orel. I have a medical degree,  and  I  work  in private practice as a dentist. I'm lonely. I found your profile in a marriage agency "Arcadia," in my town. It cost
me 5,000 rubles. I hope I have not wasted wasting my money. I've never been  married,  and  I  have  no  children.  A serious relationship to interest  me. I want to meet people, to have a family with him. I know that  most  women  in  Europe and America is emancipated, and in first place  in  the  life of the work put. A family for them, it's more the
point against which it is necessary to put a tick. I want to a family, a  family for me the main thing. I wanted to know you. I hope that our interests  are  mutual.  I  beg  to be written only in this case, if I
really  interesting for you in vain ... I do not want to waste time. I tuned  to a serious relationship. It's tough when I'll talk more about myself  in  next  letter. I'll be glad to receive your letter, I would
like  to see your photos. I look forward to your next letter. Your new friend 
Kseniya

I think I'm hearing wedding bells. Nope. Guys, she is an attractive woman but remember this, how do you know who you're really talking to????

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Twitchers Gamers

If any of you folks who lurk about as shadows are hard core gamers and into the interactive online scene, Arimi Mimi is the one to watch. I think she's currently playing Redemption. She's a great gal and would love for you to come join her. Here's the link Redemption

Saturday, June 13, 2015

Relationships, Dating, My Russian Love

Meet my newest potential Russian bride, Kseniya.


Salute my new fellow. My name is Kseniya. I've never looked for online personal knowledge online, and now I'm a little concerned a little. < Her English is more concerning then her thoughts, so far.>
When I showed your account, <???> I understood that it`s engaging. I want to tell a pair of some interesting facts about myself. <You know the pair I’m interested in.>  I am 27 years old. I am a fair woman with green eyes. I live in Orel, it absolutely not very far from Moscow. <Absolutely is not very far from Moscow. I guess this is a relevance of geography.>  Perhaps it can be you interested what did I ever do for fun. < Did I ask??>  I play sports. I always keep myself in good shape. I love the bicycle, volleyball, swimming and skis. I am a doctor-stomatologist. < She’s a what??!!! Where are my medical friends? Is there such a thing?”  I like to help people. 
I`m looking for the man who wants to have regular and solid relations. I don't want to waste time for amusements. <She has no idea how much she could be.>  I looking forward you also value your time. I was never married and I have no children. If you wish to reach our talk, write me.
<Gotta love that last line. “If you wish to reach our talk, write me. How can one reach, talk and write at the same time?>



Response
Good afternoon, Kseniya.  I can’t tell you how much you’ve touched me by reaching out. I look forward to more thought provoking and provocative conversations.


Jeff

Buy the Book

How do you do it? Well, let's make it easy. To date, the site has almost garnered 40,000 hits. That's pretty impressive. What would be even better is if it picked up a few more followers. I know. Who wants to keep receiving constant updates and cluttering up their in box. I'm in there with on that one. I've stopped following quit a few sites because of the constant repetitive bombarding of new updates. For those who stop in, you know I don't do that. On the average, about five to ten a month, unless I've gone on a reading spree and post reviews. Other than that, I try and keep it to a minimum. 

Now, let's get down to nitty-gritty. If you see something you like on the side bars, all you have to do is click on the image and you are taken straight to the buy link. It really is that simple. 

Without further adeu, it's time to get back to reading, writing, editing and reviewing. 

Baseball is Back

We are at the sixty game mark and still the Astros and Mets won't go away. Many in April were writing them off as "quick starts", "plain luck" or the ever ubiquitous "Upstarts." I love it when the MLB and ESPN gurus are wrong. Perhaps they should have to take a pay cut for errant reporting. Yeah, don't see that happening. Still, good to see the Texas Rangers​ in the hunt. And what of the Texas Rangers? A team who had four of their proposed starting pitchers sidelined, and I'll be honest, I didn't pick them to perform this well, are nipping at the heels of Houston. How are they doing this? That really is the question when you realize they are second in errors in baseball. Guts and grit. That's how it's happening. Look at the victory last night against the Twins. What was looking like another shut-out exploded with a flurry of key hits, defense and a budding bullpen, allowed them to keep the game in striking distance and strike they did. The starters are doing their job by keeping the game in reach. That, my friends is how you combat injuries. Never give up!

The only teams I would count out are the Brewers, Reds and Phillies. For whatever reason, their tanks appear to be empty. As for the remaining clubs, it's anybody's guess how the standings will look come September 1st. Until then it's going to wild and wooly.


Let’s Play Ball!